4 Quarters Radio: September 30 1st Quarter

The first-quarter curriculum for September 30:
--Scott's all alone in the studio, but he's still locked and loaded. Being a solutions-oriented sort, he offers the perfect center for Mike Vick and his banged-up hand. He then moves on to note that everyone involved with the story is protesting a bit too much.
--Scott is able to cite some statistics that can defuse anyone who's inclined to call Vick's problems racial in nature. Several other teams have their QB's getting hit more often than Philly.
--Logan Propst, who should be in the studio, instead turns up on the phone and offers his thoughts on Vick as well.
--Los Guys turn to Minnesota and ponder the real culprit for the Vikings' epic second-half failures. This, naturally, leads into a discussion of Madden etiquette.
--Scott starts an impromptu game of Medal Stand, ranking his top three teams most likely to Suck for Luck. Logan's not in the mood to play, but Scott's more than able to rise to the occasion.

Featured music: "From a Table Away" by Sunny Sweeney.

4 Quarters Radio: April 29 1st Quarter

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The first-quarter curriculum for April 29:
--Early recording problems lead to a slightly abrupt start, but the fellas jump right into NFL Draft Round 1 discussion. Blaize talks up Jake Locker, the Titans' new quarterback, and everyone digs into the top picks by their respective teams.
--Other picks get checked out for genius, idiocy, or simple oddity. Nick Fairley, Julio Jones, Mark Ingram, and others get examined.

Featured music: "I Should Have Known" by the Foo Fighters. Stick around at the end for a brief snippet of the track, and help the show out by purchasing the full download if you like it.

4 Quarters Radio: January 14 4th Quarter

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The fourth-quarter curriculum for January 14:
--4QR gets a rare listener call-in, and the discussion veers toward the Seagulls' lack of qualifications for the playoffs.
--Los Guys discuss the State of Their Teams, including the proper result of the Fisher-Young showdown, whether Skeletor needs to spend to keep Nnamdi Asomugha, and the comparisons between Bob Sanders and Kenny McCormick.
--The Ultimate Fighter coaches have been named, and the idea of Brock Lesnar weekly on Spike seems like a sure recipe for fun and disaster.
--Scott explains why the Knicks need to simply walk away from Melo.
--In the Epic Fails, Bobby calls out a clumsy corner, Logan gasses a Nazi ref, and Scott marvels at how people will pay multiple hundreds of dollars expressly to stand outside a stadium.

Excised music: "Always Something" by Cage the Elephant.

4 Quarters Radio: January 14 3rd Quarter

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The third-quarter curriculum for January 14:
--The fellas talk about other results from Wild Card Weekend, and somehow, Tony Dungy gets blame for a loss. Not literally, but Jim Caldwell gets very little credit for anything.
--Bobby gets salt rubbed in the wound after the Eagles' loss to Green Bay, as the discussion even veers back toward the Minnesota game.
--The guys ponder how far is too far when it comes to talking trash. Bobby even anticipates a feminine field invasion. For Logan's part, he's perfectly fine with profanity...but one could probably guess that by now.
--The AFC divisional rivalries are compared, and the guys come to a decision on which is more entertaining. Then, all four games are forecast.

Excised music: "Sick of You" by Cake.

4 Quarters Radio: October 7 4th Quarter

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The fourth-quarter curriculum for October 7:
--Scott, Bobby, and Dylan ponder the Randy Moss trade and examine if the Patriots may possibly have been just as desperate as the Vikings.
--Bobby gets a moment to shake his head and get bummed out by the re-emergence of Kevin Kolb. Meanwhile, Scott ponders the psychic effects that the Eagles defense may have suffered from Donovan McNabb receiving a standing ovation.
--Scott wonders if Jay Cutler's been marked for death...by his own offensive coordinator.
--A quick update of the 4 Quarters fantasy league, Scott bemoans his 1-3 start, but unveils his nefarious plan to capitalize on a pair of suspensions.
--After the 10-minute warning, Scott puts Bobby on the spot and asks him to pick a winner between the three ex-Arkansas running backs currently toiling in the NFL (Darren McFadden, Felix Jones, Peyton Hillis). No points for guessing which one he picks.
--Also no points for guessing who Bobby chooses as his Epic Fail. Dylan stays local, and Scott calls out a guy whose managerial career was one loss short of being historically terrible.

Excised music: "Stumbling Through the Dark" by the Jayhawks.

4 Quarters Radio: September 23 3rd Quarter

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The third-quarter curriculum for September 23:

--A belated Whodaman starts off the second half. Logan's selfish, giving love to his fantasy football stalwart, while Scott honors the triumph of upstanding players over field-crashing idiots.
--Scott's briefly solo, and takes the time to weigh in on the NFL teams changing quarterbacks after only two games. For the most part, they're the teams that one would expect to be flailing for answers.
--Scott sounds a death knell for Percy Harvin's NFL career, wondering how anyone can absorb that kind of physical abuse and work around migraines.
--Bobby arrives and immediately gets to weigh in on his teams, the Raiders and Eagles, with their new signal-callers.
--Bobby also pauses to ponder whether or not Jeff Fisher has a personal grudge against Vince Young. Scott, meanwhile, celebrates the first Kerry Collins sighting as the true beginning of fall.
--Scott spotlights which NFL team will be last to win...AND when it will happen. Write it down.

Excised music: "Take It Back" by The Qemists.

4 Quarters Radio Episode 10: 2nd Half

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On March 23's second half of 4QR, the guys have scheduling issues with their planned guest, so they freestyle a bit. Scott opens a discussion of how fanbases "sell out" to support their teams in the face of some ethical concerns about players or coaches. Moving on to the NFL, the burning question is "WTF is Charlie Whitehurst?" Joseph interjects with a random celebrity ('s relative) sighting, the fellas talk some NFL Draft trivia, and Andy Reid gets compared to Shaft. (Seriously.) Referees' testicles get abused, and that's before the Epic Fails. Excised music: "I'll Be Your Friend" by Bright Eyes/Neva Dinova and "Heart of Steel" by Galactic featuring Irma Thomas.

Full Moon Fever: Has the NFL Gone Completely Mental This Season?

I've been actively following football for twenty-five years. I like to think I've seen quite a bit from the game in that time. But, to be honest with you, I don't think I've seen a season get ramped up with this much goofiness since the players were walking in off the street in 1987.

First, it's Michael Vick the Eagle. Supposedly, it's all Donovan McNabb's idea, giving the offense another weapon to play with. Fair enough. If Vick's half the player he was when he went inside, he's dangerous. And not just to your pitbulls.

Then, we have McNabb being his usual candid self and saying it'd be great to have a target like Plaxico "O,MFL!" Burress. On one hand, it seems like the usually character-driven Eagles are in danger of being turned into Raiders East, the new halfway house of the NFL. On the other hand, it seems like McNabb's more interested in lobbying for sainthood than polishing his resume for the Hall of Fame. St. Donovan, the patron saint of NFL lost causes. If anyone asks Donovan about Pacman Jones, Philly fans need to run for the hills.

Speaking of the Raiders, they can always be counted on to be some kind of goofy, even boiling down to players fighting in camp. See Williams, Marcus and Romanowski, Bill (the fellas to the left...guess who won the fight).

Now, we have assistant coach Randy Hanson allegedly playing Glass Joe to Tom Cable's Little Mac...even though Cable bears more resemblance to King Hippo, honestly. I love Cable's answers to questions about the incident.

"Sure, I can address it. It's an internal issue that we're dealing with, and that's all I'm gonna say."

Translation: I can address it...but I'm not going to address it. Unfortunately, Tom, once someone got sent to the hospital and the police got involved, it kinda stopped being internal.

If we think we're going to get answers from anyone Raider-affiliated, keep dreaming. The Mafia and Fight Club take tips from Al Davis on ways to keep people from talking. Randy Hanson is, according to the San Jose Mercury News's Tim Kawakami, Al Davis's boy on the staff. As a key witness in Davis's legal war with Lane Kiffin, Hanson may be enjoying the equivalent of diplomatic immunity. He's not been at work since the incident on August 5th, but I'd be quite surprised if he's no longer on the payroll. Knowing Al, he may just pay Hanson to sit home and eat Bon-Bons until the Kiffin case gets settled.

Meanwhile, Cable may get whacked. Figuratively, literally, either way. Depends on Al's mood that day.

Finally, we have Brett Favre allegedly taking career advice from his ten-year-old daughter. Seriously, is his daughter Dakota Fanning? The entire "do what you have to do" speech sounds ripped straight from an Oscar consideration reel. Either your heart melted when he recounted this story, or you rolled your eyes and threw another layer of BS on top of the already sizeable pile that's come out of both Favre and Brad Childress over the last several months. And you might be able to guess that I haven't had to call the mop crew.

And yes, I said several months. Meaning more than three or four. This situation has been in the works for a lot longer than anyone will admit, and it'd shock me if there was no tacit understanding that Brett would show up as soon as he could without going to Mankato State University and bunking in a dorm for training camp.

I do have to give Brett one thing, he didn't do too terribly wrong by the Jets. The Packers had slipped a poison pill into their trade with New York that would have sent three first-rounders to Green Bay if the Jets had traded him to an NFC North team. Favre retired again, let the Jets release him, and got them off the hook for those picks. Good show there. And yes, it's rather sad that I have to applaud a guy for not actively screwing his old team.

Speaking of getting screwed, how long before Tarvaris Jackson goes on Vince Young suicide watch? He and Sage Rosenfels got lied to for months. They may have been the only guys thinking that there might be a chance that Favre would stay retired. But every Viking player needs to pay close attention here, because there but for the grace of God goes every player in that locker room. "We're moving on, we're closing the book, Sage and Tarvaris are our guys...whoops, sorry guys, gotta skip out for a little bit of practice so I can go pick up a GOOD quarterback from the airport." Good luck getting the guys to play to the whistle for all 16 games, Coach.

I'll put it down here, the Vikings go either 7-9 or 8-8, miss the playoffs, and Brad Childress gets fired. The final month of the season, Favre's chucking it 40 times per game, AP's getting 12 carries, and they wonder why the defense starts giving up more points. All that, of course, if the rotator cuff doesn't disintegrate.

If we're going to get any loonier, I think it'll have to entail someone ripping Tom Brady's arm off and letting loose nothing but a shower of sparks and dangling wires. Or Bill Belichick turns out to be one of those Hulu aliens. Or Jared Allen shows up to a game in nothing but a loincloth. Actually, considering the source, that last one just might happen.