Sunday, October 25, 2009

3FL Week 6: Patriot Games

For those wondering why I didn't post an action shot of Mr. Brady...um...look at the picture again. Me personally, I'd rather look at "action shots" of Mrs. Brady, but as far as we know, none exist. No disgruntled staff in that house, apparently.

Week 6 was quite nerve-wracking for me, as my surviving my second straight week of potential Redskinning came down to whether Matt Prater could outkick Nate Kaeding...AND Tony Scheffler. Elsewhere, a brotherly battle had one throwing up his hands and threatening quitting.

Mooby Mafia (3-3) def. Lady Shark (0-6) 136.24-135.15
Poptropica (4-2) def. Valhalla (0-6) 119.88-117.76
Blue Rookie Monsters (3-3) def. Kirbdogs (4-2) 116.77-68.43
Gutter's Tools (4-2) def. God'sRightHand (2-4) 117.66-83.65
Salsa Shark (6-0) def. SuicideSquad (2-4) 142.74-127.28
Mules (4-2) def. Carpet Munchers (4-2) 136.67-110.67

If it's any consolation, Jay, I was pulling for ya. It'd be poetic justice for the Redskin fan to be the one to end someone's long losing streak. In the even bigger story, Da Shark has now opened up a two-game lead on the field, but I'm not 100% sure that the regular-season winner has ever carried it all the way to the championship. Someone's gonna have to verify me on that one.

This week's All-3FL team...well, no points for guessing which NFL team dominated. Especially since they inspired the title of this post.

QB: Tom Brady (51.7 for Salsa Shark)
WR: Randy Moss (35.9 for Mooby Mafia)
WR: Wes Welker (33 for Salsa Shark)
RB: Ray Rice (37.4 for PopaCapInYoAss)
WR/RB: Maurice Jones-Drew (37.3 for Mules)
WR/TE: Marques Colston (27.6 for Carpet Munchers)
K: Ryan Longwell (16 for Salsa Shark)
DEF: Broncos (29.12 for Gutter's Tools)

Amazingly, for the first week this season, there was no one on anyone's bench or the FA wire who would have put up All-3FL scores. Yes, there's no one floating about in the middle of nowhere who could roll up 150 rushing yards and 3 TD's. We're that good.

Justin's tied Amanda with 8 All-3FL performers, and just like her, his are coming in spurts. She had six in the first two weeks, he's had six in the last two. Hopefully for him, this doesn't mean that he's due for a four-game losing streak.

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Yahoo's Point Spreads had three of the games looking close this week, and two of them actually delivered. Both of those actually featured favorites failing to cover the spread.

PS=Projected Spread
AS=Actual Spread
Diff.=Difference (If the difference is positive, then the winner covered the spread.)

Mooby Mafia favored over Lady Shark (PS=1.53, AS=1.09, Diff.=-0.44)
Pop-Up Campers over Valhalla (PS=4.21, AS=2.12, Diff.=-2.09)
BRM over Kirbdogs (PS=31.28, AS=48.34, Diff.=17.06)
SuicideSquad over Salsa Shark (PS=1.6, AS=-15.46, Diff.=-17.06) (Whoa...see the Diff in the above line. Damn, that's trippy.)
Gutter's Tools over GRH (PS=15.24, AS=34.01, Diff.=18.77)
Mules over Carpet Munchers (PS=20.54, AS=26, Diff.=5.46)

Jon was finally favored for the first time, and nearly coughed it up. Meanwhile, Steve keeps bringing gaudy projections, and backing them up exactly 50% of the time. He and Amanda are fifth and fourth in the league in scoring, but combine for a 5-7 record. Kirby's ninth in scoring, and sits 4-2. Sometimes, there's no justice.

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I may have officially waved the white flag vis a vis the Swami award this week, as I totally brainfarted the voting process. I blame the sightseeing train the wife and I took on Saturday. Eight hours of looking at fall foliage in bright sunshine can be fun...looking at it on a dreary-ass, overcast, intermittently rainy day can turn your brains to tapioca faster than TV.



That commercial's still seriously fucking disturbing. Everyone else made it look like a pretty predictable week.

For the week:
Kirby: 5-1
Justin, Dave, Steve, Tim, Mireya, Jason, Bill: 4-2
Amanda: 3-3

For the season:
Justin: 22-14
Dave, Steve, Tim: 20-16
Kirby: 19-12
Mireya: 18-12
Jason: 18-18
Amanda: 17-19
Bill: 16-14
Scott: 14-16

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Being in the rare position of voting underdog can only help Justin pull away in the F-U Award standings. As I said last week, it's hard to vote against him right now, unless someone wishbones Tom Brady again and he has to turn to Mark "Dirty" Sanchez. Funny enough, he voted against HIMSELF this week. For some reason, I suspect the loss of some alcohol-induced wager, because that's just not typical.

Mooby Mafia 7 votes, Lady Shark 2 (Winner: La Mafia)
Poptopia 5, Valhalla 4 (Winner: I'm Running Out of Goofy Pop Names)
BRM 7, Kirbdogs 2 (Winner: BRM)
SuicideSquad 6, Salsa Shark 3 (Winner: Shark Steak)
Gutter's Tools 8, GRH 1 (Winner: Gutter's Tools)
Mules 6, Carpet Munchers 3 (Winner: Mules)



Points
Justin 39
Jon 27
Kirby 24
Bill 18
Tim 17
Dave 16
Steve 8
Adam 5
Scott 4
Amanda -11
Mireya -14
Jason -36

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And with that, I jet once again. Just in time for Week 7's games to start. This week, I get to see how much punch God has in his Right Hand, Dave takes the next shot at slowing Justin's roll...and barring an absolute miracle, we're going to be down to one winless team next week, as Jason and Mireya face off. If there's a tie, get to the bomb shelter, because the Apocalypse is coming.

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